- An Introduction to Conflict Resolution
- How can passive personality deal with interpersonal conflict?
- Conflict Management Styles
- evaluate how each of the following personality types deals with interpersonal
- Getting to know yourself
An Introduction to Conflict Resolution
What makes me feel good? As you define yourself as a member of the group you will find your strengths and areas that need improving. A good exercise in community building is to share how you perceive yourself. There are a number of personality style tests that are available and offer huge value to group understanding. Getting to know one another is not a fast process, and the more the group changes and the larger it gets the longer it takes. It is hard to trust strangers and community demands a great deal of trust.
It can be easy to incorporate social activities as part of business meetings, but the group should also hold purely social gatherings, where the point is to have fun. Share stories of where you grew up, important turning points in your life, people who you admire.
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- How can passive personality deal with interpersonal conflict!
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Another way is to write up biographies of each other, one member interviewing another and then keeping these in a notebook for future members to read and add to. Go out for a weekend retreat and spend time talking and learning about one another. This dichotomy between task and process is very common and is often a source of conflict and frustration in community. A healthy community has a balance between task and process. Think of task and process like the wings of a bird.
How can passive personality deal with interpersonal conflict?
If one wing is shorter than the other, the bird flies around in circles. Conversely, too much process, and everybody spends much of their time in feelings meetings and the tasks that need doing languish. However, when task and process are balanced, both wings are working at maximum efficiency to carry the community in the direction it wants to go. You need process to determine the direction to go and how to work together, you need task orientation to accomplish all the jobs needed. Often the conflicts that arise from process and task chafing come from personality styles.
There are a number of tests, such as Meyers-Briggs that measure how a person reacts to events and people. The sum total of these reactions are called your personality style. Personality style characterizes how you approach group work and can and usually does effect your attitudes about other people you work with.
A task oriented person is a person who gets great pleasure in getting results. They create prioritized, bulleted to do lists and then check off items accomplished. They are often fact and results driven, and want the bottom line clearly defined. They often want details organized, and they tend to know exactly where things are.
Conflict Management Styles
So conversely, they are uncomfortable with ambiguity and get annoyed by discussions that are not related to tasks at hand. They have little patience for digressions. In extreme cases, if you ask them how they feel about an issue, they will minimize it, and be annoyed by the fact that you asked them for their feelings not the facts. A process oriented person is one who gets pleasure from working with people. They want to make people feel good about what is happening, and they see the world in terms of relationships.
They tend to not be interested so much in facts as the consequences of the facts and may also be disorganized, easily loosing place of the current discussion thread. They may care more about getting out peoples feelings than worrying about details or results. They tend to be very comfortable with ambiguity and tend to get annoyed by bulleted prioritized task lists and serial sequencing.
If you ask them for the facts, they tend to want to move into relationships and concepts instead and may become annoyed that you asked them for the facts rather than their feelings. Now, both the descriptions above are huge oversimplifications of the enormously complex arena of personality types, but it illustrates the differences and sets up the idea that both styles look at group endeavors with very different perspectives. Both perspectives are equally valid. Let me repeat that: Both perspectives are equally valid. The key element to understand is that neither the task nor process orientated person is right, they simply are differences in orientation to working in the group.
Both styles and all the others that exist need to be recognized, celebrated and then worked with as the group dynamic unfolds. Ideally your group has a good mixture of styles, and although this can seem chaotic, it is actually a very good thing, much better than if you were all one style or another. Both task and process styles really do benefit the group as long as you learn what the other needs.
The meeting agenda for xyz cohousing has several issues on it and the first issue is about a process issue.
evaluate how each of the following personality types deals with interpersonal
The discussion goes on and on about how people feel about a particular issue and Task Oriented Mary is getting more and more frustrated. Finally she blows up at the facilitator for wasting so much of the meeting time on this one discussion about feelings. She stomps out of the room in a huff. Another day, another group meeting. This time the agenda item is full of numbers and lists and complex papers about some development aspect. Process Oriented Mary is detached and uninvolved.
Although she has opinions, she is feeling alienated by the whole depersonalization of the issues. At the break she leaves.
Getting to know yourself
One of the best ways for style angst to be worked out in a meeting is for the individuals to be allowed to state what they are feeling and what they want. Can we move to the proposal stage soon, or may I be excused until you finish your discussion? By clearly stating her frustrations, and proposing two solutions, she has made the group aware of her needs and the group then has choices to work with. Some larger groups use a system of colored cards where different colors represent different types of input.
In extreme cases, task oriented people will have difficulty asking for what they want and the facilitator needs to watch for angst from the task oriented people and then intervene on their behalf. Recognizing your personality style and the needs and limitations it places you under is a key step in understanding how to work with a group. Both task and process styles have important contributions to make and you have to be patient and recognize the value of styles that are different from yours.
You will be annoyed with your style opposite sometimes, so use that annoyance constructively to make changes in the process that benefit the group. If you are a task oriented person, you can help the group get organized and working on results. Your skills at seeing the bottom line can help the group when you summarize information, add facts, or urge the group towards concrete proposals. If you are a process oriented person you offer the skills of building relationships and understandings so that proposals can be made that get accepted and implemented with a high degree of spirit.
You can work to keep the morale of the group high by offering personal support and acknowledgment of peoples work. Groups often go through cycles where task or process gets emphasis in the groups activities. There may be a period where you make many decisions, hard and fast, and work with lots of information, get lots of details accomplished and then get somewhat paralyzed by what may seem to be a minor side issue.
The group then focuses on process work, working through the issue, hearing emotional side issues, talking with each other and building up communication bridges and processes. Over time, most experienced and successful groups learn to balance the task and process parts of their activities so each works to complement the other. As meeting skills grow in the group, the facilitator can capture emotional issues that get raised as part of a task agenda and skillfully roll them into the task processing so the end result is the optimum for everyone.
When you can balance both the task wing and the process wing so they work together, your group will fly as high as it can go. One technique that can bring this out is to do a feeling circle, in which everyone in the group expresses how they are feeling. The goals of the feelings circle should be written down and placed where everyone can see them. Some sample goals:. The way feeling circles work is for members to simply state whatever is on their mind.
For this kind of sharing to work it is important that the circle not be interrupted by defensive answers, but that each person is allowed to speak without interruption. Participants have to be free to express feelings without immediate reaction. If this becomes part of the meeting routine, even very shy individuals may come to express themselves. Sometimes feeling circles can be focused on a specific issue. They can be a way of dealing with a particular issue, a conflict between individuals, an individual behavior, or even as a healing source for someone who loses a family member or has some other personal crisis.
Or they can be general in nature, focusing on getting to know one anothers histories by responding to set questions such as: A story from my childhood, people that are important to me, lessons in life I have learned and who taught them, the most important thing I ever did, the most dangerous moment in my life. These kinds of sharing circles allow people to learn about each other in new ways. Active listening is a skill which enhances communication. In active listening you listen carefully, then paraphrase back what you heard, with the goal of supporting and drawing out the feelings of the speaker.
When this is done well it validates a persons feelings and encourages him or her to fully communicate. The goal of active listening is to help clarify the feelings and thinking behind the words. When active listening is applied it creates a supportive bond between the speaker and the listener. Because there is no threat of criticism or judgment, the speaker is encouraged to express feelings honestly. The important thing about active listening is that it is not intended to change or alter the feelings of the speaker, only to support them in expressing their feelings.
When you try and advise or change the message the speaker gives, it forces them to defend themselves, which often causes further denial of the feelings and experiences. When the listener responds by trying to change the speakers way of looking at things, to see the situation from the listeners perspective, the listener is trying to divert the communication down the path to meet their needs, not the speakers. Collaborating individuals aim to come up with a successful resolution creatively, without compromising their own satisfactions.
Competition involves authoritative and assertive behaviors. In this style, the aggressive individual aims to instil pressure on the other parties to achieve a goal.
It includes the use of whatever means to attain what the individual thinks is right. Dealing with the conflict with an open mind is vital for a resolution to be met.
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Compromising is about coming up with a resolution that would be acceptable to the parties involved. Thus, one party is willing to sacrifice their own sets of goals as long as the others will do the same. Hence, it can be viewed as a mutual give-and-take scenario where the parties submit the same amount of investment for the problem to be solved. A disadvantage of this strategy is the fact that since these parties find an easy way around the problem, the possibility of coming up with more creative ways for a solution would be neglected.
Given the different conflict management styles , you might be thinking of the one style that would suit you the most. It is important to note that the strategy involved in coming up with a resolution is relative to the kind of the problem. There are different ways to come with a definition of conflict. When speaking of conflict, what would immediately come into mind would most likely be how differences and disagreements make such an occurrence to spring up. Having that, let us have that question again, for the purpose of a more comprehensive discussion.
Hence, what is conflict? It can be described as a disagreement among groups or individuals characterized by antagonism and hostility. This is usually fueled by the opposition of one party to another, in an attempt to reach an objective different from that of the other party. The elements involved in the conflict have varied sets of principles and values, thus allowing such a conflict to arise. Taking a look into what causes conflict can help us understand this phenomenon even more.
Hence, let us take into consideration the common sources of conflict. What are the factors that make conflict arise? For the purpose of this discussion, let us put into attention the three main sources of conflict as proposed by American psychologist Daniel Katz. According to him, conflict arises primarily due to these three:. Economic conflict is brought about by a limited amount of resources. The groups or individuals involved then comes into conflict to attain the most of these resources, thus bringing forth hostile behaviors among those involved.
Value conflict is concerned with the varied preferences and ideologies that people have as their principles. Conflicts driven by this factor are demonstrated in wars wherein separate parties have sets of beliefs that they assert in an aggressive manner at that. Power conflict occurs when the parties involved intends to maximize what influence it has in the social setting. Such a situation can happen among individuals, groups or even nations. In other types of conflict , power is also evident as it involves an asserting of influence to another.
Conflict comes naturally; the clashing of thoughts and ideas is a part of the human experience. It is true that it can be destructive if left uncontrolled. It is a way to come up with more meaningful realizations that can certainly be helpful to the individuals involved. These positive outcomes can be reached through an effective implementation of conflict resolution. Conflict can be seen as an opportunity for learning and understanding our differences.
We can all live harmoniously despite conflicts as long as we know how to responsibly manage these struggles. Conflict is often inevitable in many situations. They may concern petty ones to the more serious ones which can lead to hostility among individuals.
The fact of the matter is, conflict is something that we live with. You cannot expect two people or groups to agree all the time. In one way or another, we are faced with many types of conflict in our day to day lives. However, conflict should not be seen as purely negative. It can become an opportunity for better things and open up opportunities, if dealt with properly. Hence, this is where conflict resolution comes in. The initial question would concern what conflict resolution is. What is it anyway? It actually is an end which has been brought about by conflict management.
It is seen as a peaceful solution to individuals and groups that are in conflict. There are a lot of means and strategies involved in dealing with conflict, and all of these aim to come up with a resolution to it. Resolving a conflict may take time and this will ultimately depend on its scale. Hence, a person who intends to acts as a mediator to parties in conflict need to have skills and know the strategies necessary to resolve conflict.
There are even available trainings for those who intend to acquire these skills. Oftentimes, when we find ourselves in conflict with other people, we seem to get into a regressive and aggressive state. In such a case, we tend to become irrational and just unreasonable so that we could get out of the conflict based on what we deem is right. Hence, it is important for the parties involve to pay attention to how a conflict can come to an end in a healthy manner. In line with this, there are ten strategies for conflict resolution shared to us by the Kansas Department of Health and Environment which you could check through this link.
The strategies stated on the link would be efficient guidelines to anyone who needs to be guided on how conflict should be dealt with. Conflict is a concept familiar to most of us. Hence, we are aware of the consequences that it can cause if it is mishandled. Thus, knowing how to go around a conflict by efficiently implementing conflict management is important for it to be resolved. Keep in mind that with the resolution of conflict comes an opportunity for growth, may it be personally or professionally. Types of Conflict — Four Classifications August 16, Brad Evans.
Conflict is classified into the following four types: Interpersonal conflict refers to a conflict between two individuals. This occurs typically due to how people are different from one another. We have varied personalities which usually results to incompatible choices and opinions. Apparently, it is a natural occurrence which can eventually help in personal growth or developing your relationships with others.
In addition, coming up with adjustments is necessary for managing this type of conflict. However, when interpersonal conflict gets too destructive, calling in a mediator would help so as to have it resolved. Intrapersonal conflict occurs within an individual. Interpersonal conflict may come in different scales, from the simpler mundane ones like deciding whether or not to go organic for lunch to ones that can affect major decisions such as choosing a career path.
Furthermore, this type of conflict can be quite difficult to handle if you find it hard to decipher your inner struggles. It leads to restlessness and uneasiness, or can even cause depression. In such occasions, it would be best to seek a way to let go of the anxiety through communicating with other people. Eventually, when you find yourself out of the situation, you can become more empowered as a person.